Posted in Life

America is a gun.

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Posted in Cute, Humour, Life

Things My Physiology Professor Has Said.

This was in a span of an hour. I managed to list out some of the things, but rest assured, this is a regular occurrence. I could make any number of posts like these. This man is a gem.

  • The flow is slow, but your ass is fast.
  • The efflux of the soul is happiness.
  • I’m an excitable boy.
  • That’s how people get married. Hey, how you doing? Wanna go out on a date with me? Sub threshold potential for happiness. Hey, let’s go away for the weekend! You’re building sub threshold potential for happiness. Hey! Let’s get married and have kids! BOOM. Action potential.
  • You know what they say about home cooking? It’s not true.
  • Why do angels fly? Because they take themselves lightly.
  • A man tastes a new dish and falls over dead instantly. What did he eat? My mother’s cooking, probably.
  • Neuromuscular transmission is like how in New York City, Little Italy is owned by the Chinese. They rent it back to the Italians. Did you know that? I didn’t know that. What was I talking about?
  • Life is based on a dynamic tension between opposites. Even in the European Union. (We were talking about puffer fish till that second.)
  • Hey, what’s wrong with your husband? He depolarizes too quickly? We want a longer action potential. We want a longer potential for action, you know what I mean?
  • If your car is over the top of a hill, and now it’s starting to roll down the hill, will you keep pushing it? Exactly. (Again, we were talking about puffer fish till seconds ago.)
  • You know, once the action potential is done, you have the refractory period. You can’t do anything about it. You know, Charlize Theron and Angelina Jolie could be in one room. Six Angelina Jolies could in a room, but you’re not gonna get anything.
  • A Tyrannosaurus Rex could probably kill me. A Brontosaurus could probably kill me. (This was said in a French accent.) (AGAIN, we were talking about puffer fish till seconds ago!)
Posted in Life, Stories

Fear.

Fear is like candy floss.
Bright and numbing.
Growing larger with every whiff of air.
And the slightest bit of heat.
I’m surrounded by candy floss.
I can see only sickly pink,
Whether my eyes are open or shut.
Outside sounds are muffled.
You’d think it would be peaceful
Inside the bubble, there’s a buzz
Of flies; they like the sugar.
There’s a stickiness to my skin;
My sweat’s dried on it a million times,
It flows pink now.
I’m stumbling, blind, deaf.
I’m lucky that I’ve reached good places.
I’m lucky that I’m standing here.
But I do not know where to go.
I did not see how I came here.

Posted in Life, Me and moi, Stories

Intermission.

To whomsoever it may concern,
A soul to crush, a heart to burn,
Would sooner take me to heaven
Than into your school.

I’m one among a thousand others,
Wrestling with our binds and tethers
Racing against one another
For a spot in the pool.

So my writing has to go.
And my blogging has to slow.
The fires of my mind that glow
Have to dim and cool.

But I’ll be back once again.
To write, hope, dream and gain
Some experience and then remain
A blogger and a fool.

Posted in Life, Me and moi, Stories

I’m Sorry I Was Late, The Traffic…

Why I Took So Long To Get Ready (ie Answers You Will Never Get From Your Girl Friends)

My wardrobe is open and filled with stuff.
Buttons and sequins and leather and fluff.
And yet I can’t choose an outfit just right
That I can put on for the party tonight.

Not this! Won’t withstand the wind or the rain
That I have to face ‘ere the party begins.
Not this! Can’t wear that on the public train
Judgemental glances will come pouring in.

What of the gown I bought a month ago?
I’ll look like a Siamese at a dog show.
What about jeans with a nice dressy top?
Too casual, I don’t want to look like a flop.

Maybe this dress? No that’s too tight.
I’ve kept it for when I’ll be a bit light.
Maybe this jumpsuit is what I should choose.
Ooh nice! But I don’t have the right shoes.

This one fits me like you won’t believe
The problem is the hole in the sleeve.
This one was my love and my go-to
Until the colour faded into a light blue.

I should just call and make an excuse
Make up an emergency, or just refuse.
I can’t be overdressed, definitely not under
That would be a terrible blunder.

Oh! That’s it! That’s just perfect for now!
Now if only time will allow,
I’ll look my best and feel even better
Here comes the chic trendsetter!