Pretty sure that I’ve talked about retail therapy on the blog before. It’s such a joy to shop! My favourite things to shop for are toiletries. Just take me to a nice, well stocked drugstore and let me be there for a couple hours with a credit card. Pure bliss.
This was in a span of an hour. I managed to list out some of the things, but rest assured, this is a regular occurrence. I could make any number of posts like these. This man is a gem.
- The flow is slow, but your ass is fast.
- The efflux of the soul is happiness.
- I’m an excitable boy.
- That’s how people get married. Hey, how you doing? Wanna go out on a date with me? Sub threshold potential for happiness. Hey, let’s go away for the weekend! You’re building sub threshold potential for happiness. Hey! Let’s get married and have kids! BOOM. Action potential.
- You know what they say about home cooking? It’s not true.
- Why do angels fly? Because they take themselves lightly.
- A man tastes a new dish and falls over dead instantly. What did he eat? My mother’s cooking, probably.
- Neuromuscular transmission is like how in New York City, Little Italy is owned by the Chinese. They rent it back to the Italians. Did you know that? I didn’t know that. What was I talking about?
- Life is based on a dynamic tension between opposites. Even in the European Union. (We were talking about puffer fish till that second.)
- Hey, what’s wrong with your husband? He depolarizes too quickly? We want a longer action potential. We want a longer potential for action, you know what I mean?
- If your car is over the top of a hill, and now it’s starting to roll down the hill, will you keep pushing it? Exactly. (Again, we were talking about puffer fish till seconds ago.)
- You know, once the action potential is done, you have the refractory period. You can’t do anything about it. You know, Charlize Theron and Angelina Jolie could be in one room. Six Angelina Jolies could in a room, but you’re not gonna get anything.
- A Tyrannosaurus Rex could probably kill me. A Brontosaurus could probably kill me. (This was said in a French accent.) (AGAIN, we were talking about puffer fish till seconds ago!)
Sometimes, when things seem overwhelming, it’s helpful to go outdoors at night. Mumbai doesn’t have the clearest skies, but whatever stars you can see, speak to you. And they tell you stories that are thousands of years old.
Fear is like candy floss.
Bright and numbing.
Growing larger with every whiff of air.
And the slightest bit of heat.
I’m surrounded by candy floss.
I can see only sickly pink,
Whether my eyes are open or shut.
Outside sounds are muffled.
You’d think it would be peaceful
Inside the bubble, there’s a buzz
Of flies; they like the sugar.
There’s a stickiness to my skin;
My sweat’s dried on it a million times,
It flows pink now.
I’m stumbling, blind, deaf.
I’m lucky that I’ve reached good places.
I’m lucky that I’m standing here.
But I do not know where to go.
I did not see how I came here.
Look, I laughed my ass off at this. I really did. I’m sorry.
You can check out @koat_tales on Instagram.
I’ve lost three four legged family members in my life. I almost cried at this.
I am ready to die for my friends. I am ready to kill for my family. But God forbid you ask me to get off my ass and answer the door. No.